Good mom, good child?

This week has been very busy, and I have learned a few things the hard way.

I always feel confident enough about being a good mom, not only because some people say so, but because my son is a happy child. As I've said before, to me, happiness reflects quality living, so a happy child reflects good parenting.

Well, this week I was tested (maybe for mother's day?) to my very end. My poor son got sick, he had high fever and apparently he just didn't feel good.

So on Thursday afternoon, packed with work as I was, I had all day, this tiny person crying "mommy-mommy-mommy-mommy" in my ear.
As bad as I felt for him, it became really difficult to be comprehensive and loving. I'm sorry to say so, but it kinda gets in your nerves after 4 hours of crying.

Then it hit me.
Am I a good mother because my son is an angel? Or is my son an angel because I'm a good mother?

I was feeling terribly sad for all those moms with bad behaved kids... How can they deal with it?? My son never complains, he goes with me everywhere and he's always smiling and saying hi to everyone. Being charming and loving, you know, doing his thing.

Everyone looks at him and comments about how they've never seen a child so beautiful or so well behaved. It's like getting rewarded everytime we go out!

NOT HIS TIME. Omg... It was living hell. Everyone kept looking at us, and I knew I was holding the annoying child who won't stop crying. And worst of all, I knew that's not who he is.

I can't believe I actually found this clipart!!

So anyway... After juggling everything between work and the sick little one... I finished working at 2 am, completely tired and knowing I had to get up at 6am.

Long story short, karma is a bitch!!

Friday afternoon I started feeling terrible and by 7pm I was burning with fever, feeling like dirt and all I could think about was my poor son crying for help the day before. I really wanted a big, long hug from him on friday. I'm sorry I couldn't be there for him more, but he chose a busy day to get sick :(

So 2 days later, with both of us feeling better and having mother's day tomorrow, I can say again that I truly believe that my son is happy because I'm a good mother, not the other way around. I believe in what I'm doing, and I feel I'm doing it right. I just hope next time he gets so sick I have a bit more patience and less work to do.

I love being a mom and it feels my heart with joy. Every insignificant tiny little anything your child does, is a gratifying moment. I feel blessed for having all I have, and I truly cherish every second of my life. The good and the bad.

I'm just learning along the way!
I guess I can wish myself a happy mother's day, and to all those moms out there who love being moms, a happy mother's day to you too!!