trying to survive with chicken soup

When I was 18 and thought about the future,  I wanted to be thin, rich and have a nice family with loving kids (6) and a loving husband. A bit of a cliche but very true. I never dreamt about the big wedding and the white dress, or any of that stuff really. I had just one goal: have lots of money.

I used to be thin, so that part never really worried me, until it was obviously too late. Knowing for some years that I was gaining weight, 40 pounds later, I realized that shipped had sailed. It wasn't a matter of 5 pounds anymore, it was real weight. Then came the pregnancy and now -9 months later- I'm on a torturing diet.

I never worried about aging, why would I? I was young. Not that I'm old now, but I'm definitely not 18 anymore. I didn't understand people who stressed out about turning 30. What's the big deal? OK, now I get it, and I'm terrified of aging. Like it's some sort of disease eating my body. My back hurts, it's harder to lose weight, wrinkles start to show, I have a mom belly...

I feel young, does that count?

Back to my goals, I'm not thin at all, I'm definitely not rich and I do have the loving family, husband, baby, dogs, etc.

I don't want to sound ungrateful, I love my husband, I'm crazy for my dogs, and my baby is the best thing that ever happened to me; but it seems unfair to me, that I'm able to do practically anything if I put my heart into it, and I'm still not able to make some freaking money or lose some weight.

I'm missing something and I don't know what it is.

I have all the ideas, I'm capable of  making them happen, all I need is the money. 

Oh, that's right. 

So it's a circle? I need money to create a successful business to make some money. 

Well I'm getting there. I hope I can open a boutique later this year. I hope I can sell more and more desserts (and stop eating half of them). And then I'll finally have my small fortune to start something big...

Once again going back to the goals, specifically to the thin part.

Since I had that episode with my back two weeks ago, I started a diet, went on a weight-loss plan and I'm being tortured with some weight-loss massages that I'm not sure are massages at all. It's just a group of women who hate fat people and feel pleasure by hitting them and making them feel pain.

Well, it's not as horrible as it sounds, but I DID CRY on Monday.

The orange juice-and-chicken soup-for-5-days diet has worked like a charm, and I've lost 6 pounds already, I'll start exercising on Monday so I can keep getting those pounds off my hips and belly. It's been very hard not cheating on the diet, but today I think I passed the test. I had a family kitchen shower-lunch thing I had to go, so I took my lunch box with me and ate my pathetic chicken broth with a boiled chicken breast while 15 people around me had a sushi buffet :-(

I didn't even try a piece.
I was proud of myself. Still am.

 
I don't understand why it's so hard for me to diet. I really do live for food. I honestly don't think there's another human being enjoying every flavour going in their mouth as much as me. You can call me Remi ;)

Isn't nicotine supposed to be the hardest thing to quit? I used to smoke up to 2 packs of cigarettes and when I got pregnant I quit for good. It wasn't easy, but it wasn't as hard as 3 days of diet.

Just 3 days (still a lifetime to go) ??? OMG, if do lose my 25 pounds, how in hell am I gonna be able to keep them down? I have to diet for the rest of my life?? Eating healthy it's called, I call it torture. For someone who loves carbs, and loves cooking, it's mission impossible. I'll have to stop being such a lazy ass and start exercising.

So I was thinking today about my unaccomplished goals and the ones that I did accomplish, and thought that maybe getting thin is the first step to being a millionaire (Lol)! It doesn't make sense at all, but if good things do come together, I really do hope that the other thing is lots of money!!

I haven't cooked this week, which is torture because that's my anxiety release.

I'm sharing a few recipes with you :) I hope you can enjoy them in the name of love!

CHURROS WITH CHOCOLATE SAUCE 

This is the easiest recipe ever! I love it, you can make the churros with any sauce, or just coated in sugar. 

Put in a small heavy-based pan 1 cup of water, 2tbsp butter and a pinch of salt. Bring to a boil and turn the heat down. Add 1 cup flour until a big ball forms.
Heat 2 cups of vegetable oil. Using a cookie press, make the churros directly on the oil and deep fry until they are golden brown.
Remove the churros from the oil, and place them in a dish with sugar, sugar and cinnamon or pat them dry with paper.

To make the chocolate sauce, melt about 150g (5oz) with 3/4 cup cream and stir until well blended.

You can also make balls instead of churros if you don't have a cookie press or piping bag.
You can fill the churros (or balls) with the sauce instead of dipping them into it.

Please try this recipe and enjoy!!

 

You're fat, and your spine can't take it

On Thursday morning I picked up my baby, and found myself crying with pain. I wasn't able to move, and had to spend the rest of the day with someone helping me with him. On top of it, my knee had been bothering for a while and was a little swollen.
I went to the doctor and had some x-rays done, both knee and back, then went back home. 

Friday afternoon I had to go back to the doctor to show him the x-rays and hear the terrible news of some terrible problem I thought I had.

Diagnose:
You're fat.

I won't lie, I DID see that one coming.

So the doctor tells me:
As a doctor I'd tell you that you're wight is too much for your spine and you must lose some pounds. As a friend, I'd tell you that it's not so nice being overweight, right? Do you feel good being overweight?

Nope. I don't.
At all.
Really. Why on earth would I feel good being overweight? My back hurts, my knees hurt, my belly looks as if I'm pregnant again, my clothes won't fit, I can't jog for 5 straight minutes without feeling like my heart is gonna explode...
And, did I mention, MY CLOTHES DON'T FIT.

As a fashion designer, the best plus about it, is being able to make your own clothes. Some crazy trend comes, and I don't have to spend millions on wearing it. I don't really even have to spend even a hundred. I'll buy some fabric and make my clothes.
This advantage goes away the moment I don't feel comfortable about wearing those clothes.

So yes, I do wanna lose weight.

I must say that I realize I'm not THAT overweight. I have between 20 or 30 extra pounds on me, but the thing is, I used to be very very thin. And my bones are meant to hold a smaller body I guess, because my back feels as if I'd weight 200 pounds at least.

I'll try to lose 25 pounds, I hope I can make it.

The thing with me is that I don't do anything about my weight. I don't diet, I don't exercise, I don't even complain about it... I just remind everyone, including myself, every second of the day that I'm overweight. If I'd go on a diet and make some exercise, I'm sure I'd lose at least 10 pounds in 2 months. If not more.
But that's where my problem comes, if I don't do anything and am fat, it doesn't matter, because I know I'm not doing anything about it. If I start dieting and sweating like a pig to see the scale go down ONE pound, I'll start freaking out and be very depressed.

Am I right?

Anyway, since the doctor not only said I am fat but also look indubitably fat, I'll start my regimen on Monday.
No more cookies, cakes, muffins, pies, tarts or chocolates.

It will be hard cooking without eating a cookie every now and then!!

And I bought 3 pounds of white chocolate today :(
I'm making tomorrow white chocolate chip oatmeal cookies. Yummy!! I'll have to eat them all as a farewell treat (LOL)!

                                                                        Good bye Churros : (

Tomorrow I'll post many of my sweet recipes as a farewell to my endless love to food!!
Until then, I shall dream about chocolate, garlic and love!!
 

aaaaaaaaarghhh. ok.

So I started in english.
Then switched to spanish.
Then switched back to english.I decided it would be about food and cooking and the pleasure of eating.
Then I wanted to throw something about design in there too, but realized it didn't have a theme anymore, so I created another blog about design.
Then I wanted to talk about everything.
That's when I got really confused.Then had a brake and finally did it in spanish and talked about food. I decided that I should go with my first ideas, because those usually are the ones that work.

Well, I was wrong! We're back to english, and now I decided it will be about me really. Having so much to say and no one interested in every aspect of my everyday life, a blog sounded as the prefect victim for the crap falling off my head.
My husband is normally the victim, but I am aware that even though he listens and has always something to say about what I say, there are topics that aren't of his interest.
Like the invites I made for my niece's pajama party. They came out as the cuttest invites to EVER be on earth. And I was very proud of them! So I showed him, and he was excited and complimented me and my niece, but it's like he knows I'm able to do every sort of thing that crosses my mind, so sometimes I need someone to be wowed about what I do!

This are the pretty pretty invites!

I guess you should know that my mother tongue is not english but spanish. So if you see some weird grammar or spelling, its not cause I'm weird but because it's not my first language ;)

I'm weird too, don't get me wrong (LOL), but that's a different story.I'm a fashion designer, but my newest passion is cooking (which would easily explain my extra pounds). I'm a new mom, my son is 8 months old, but I have an older son, which is my 3 year old dog. My family has grown in two years, from being my husband and me, to being my husband, me, Nemo (my dog), Lola (Nemo's daughter), my son, and Chiqui (chi-ki) (Nemo & Lola's daughter).

On my behalf I must say that I did my best keepig them apart so they didnt breed together, but I guess nature is stronger. So Chiqui was born on november and I found myself with a month and a half baby and a newborn puppy. It was difficult, but we did it.
Chiqui was supposed to go, but you can imagine the rest of the story, I was a new mom, sensitive, and it just broke my heart to let her go.
So she stayed.

And now I have family that's half humans and half dogs!

So besides being a new mom, fashion designer, dog lover, wife and cook, I like doing pretty much anything (except sports, which once again, explains my extra pounds).

This is me. I don't go out like this, they asked me to personify the red queen on a local magazine, so I colored my hair red and made me a pretty dress :)

This is normal me with my delicious son

I don't have much free time really, I'm a full time mom + a full time designer. I sell cookies and desserts and I want to do some easy catering to start some kind of bussiness that involves cooking.

So I'll try to post some good recipes but in between I'll may talk about pretty much anything!